In the Body Acceptance movement, the term “concern troll” gets thrown around a lot. Here is my definition and please add to it. This is a fluid conversation and I am open to your thoughts. Here is the “Urban Dictionary Definition of Concern Troll.” (Photo credit Joke.co.uk.)
The term does such a disservice to troll dolls, sadly. I mean, I love troll dolls. Who doesn’t? But, the b.s. concern trolls can kiss the fattest part of my fat ass.
I own a plus size lingerie store in San Jose and we have been “trolled” and “shamed” since the first day we opened, essentially. It turns out that some people out in the cyber world truly have very real disdain for fat people. No real explanation for why. They just really hate people of size. And, it really fuels their mean spirited “fire” if you are fat and happy. They just cannot even imagine how that could even be possible. I mean, you are fat, right? How could also also be happy? (I almost said “fappy” but that word “fap” has way too many other meanings. 🙂 )
To me, a concern troll is a person who has “fake” concern for a fat person’s health. They are comment on You Tube, Facebook and blogs talking about how unhealthy I must me. They talk about how unhealthy my customers must be because we are not a part of that “beauty ideal” that the media forces down our throat.
For example: Have you ever been out to lunch or dinner with a person who likes to treat the wait staff like crap? For some reason, they think they are better than the “lowly” server and so they treat them like a servant? So embarassing! I use to work with a woman who did it every time we went out to lunch at a restaurant that had servers. She felt like “they” worked for her and it was their job to bring her lunch quickly and perfectly. She belittled them. Talked to them like they were less than her in some way. Really treated all of them like they were plebes.
Concern trolls are a bit like that. They like to make you feel small or somehow lower on the totem pole than they are. They are typically anonymous (like the troll in the troll costume pictured above) and rarely have a real face picture associated with their online i.d. They want to tell you how fat you are and how you will die a young age and that you are going to choke on your pizza and donuts. Often the will say things like “you are better off dead, you ham planet.” Seriously. They hate themselves so much and just cannot stand the idea that you might actually be fat and happy… or fat and successful. (My article about being FAT and HAPPY.) They throw threats around online talking about how you would be better off dead. They say awful things about you and they don’t even know you. SERIOUSLY. I am not even kind of joking.
The only way they can feel good about themselves is to make you feel like shit about yourself. They put you down, they try to put you “in your place”, they try to shame you and tell you that they are concerned for your health and concerned for the economy. They just know you are going to die of a stroke and assume every fat person on the planet has diabetes and high blood pressure. (Which, btw, I have niether.)
They are very very “worried” about you and your fat body. For real. These total strangers who do not know you and who do not know one thing about your fitness level are “concerned” about you. It’s a crock of bullshit. And, seriously. You can be a size 4 and they will still talk massive amounts of crap about your body. Just ask Kelly Clarkson, PINK, Paris Hilton, Madonna and scores of other thin celebrities. It’s not really about your body. It’s about their own relationship with their body.
The only way these sad, anonymous individuals can feel even a bit good about themselves is to make it seem like they are on some moral high ground because they are thin and fit and beautiful. (Or they think they are.) You and I are ugly and fat. It’s interesting that they are always anonymous, isn’t it. They rarely can come out and show their actual faces. They hide behind their bullshit emoticons and cute little emojis on Reddit, Facebook and You Tube.
They are NOT cute, like a troll doll. The only way they know how to feel good about themselves is to tear you and me down. But, as the saying goes, people can only make you feel like shit about yourself if you let them. They are sad people who are likely very isolated and in some cases maybe even have some mental health issues.
My point it that they are not really targeting YOU specifically. I know it feels like it, but if it isn’t you, it will be someone else. These people have ZERO better things to do. I always envision them as some sad teenage boy who is like on his computer in his parent’s basement (probably masturbating to the pictures of the glorious fat women in their lingerie on my website) with very few social skills and probably confused about why he finds these fat bodies sexy. Maybe it’s a woman on the other side of the computer writing their b.s. Maybe it’s a fat woman who doesn’t understand how to be fat and happy and she is envious of those of us who are not apologizing for our bodies. Who knows. We will never know. They are anonymous and cowards who would never say 1/100th of what they say online to my face or to yours.
And, I tell you, the HATERS are MY MOTIVATORS. As I say over and over again, they can kiss the fattest part of my fat ass. This mean bullshit bullying that goes on online around women’s bodies are really what gets me out of bed in the morning whistling all the way to work where I spend my day helping FAT, SEXY women become even sexier. I will sell lingerie to curvy women until I take my last sexy breath. EVERYONE deserves to feel sexy and beautiful and it is my life’s mission
MUAH to all of the sexy curvy women reading this and and even bigger MUAH to all of the trolls who are.
Love,
Chrystal Bougon
Owner and Resident Curvy Girl
www.CurvyGirlInc.com
Tel: 408-264-4227